Countdown: (20) Shower

Shower Day is here! I joked to the Mother of the Bride that I should show up with wet hair to help with the “shower effect.” Needless to say, I plan on drying it nicely. 

I look forward to it – and discovering what has been hidden in the dining room and refrigerator that I was banned from seeing before today.

A few things will be hidden from the guests – like my “dress of color” which I hand-carried on the airplane the other day from Michigan. The bridal salon, B. Ella,  said that they could fold it into a little package (wrapped in ribbons, of course) and I could have it pressed in New Jersey. It fit in a duffle bag and is now hanging up in my parents’ house waiting to be pressed at a local bridal gown store. 

I have also been gathering together a number of gifts – from the presents for the bridesmaids to favors for the hotel welcome bags. Phew! Lots of planning and lots of my parents hauling boxes up to my old room. They have been good sports about everything. It is not easy to coordinate a wedding from another state.

Last night was the Bachelorette Party! What a wonderful dinner of tapas, sangria and laughs… just amazing. See how much fun you can have without strippers and penis straws? Thank you, Chief, for spearheading all of the planning.

I keep being surprised by how special all of these pre-wedding festivities have been (from a facial with my step-mother-in-law-to-be to last night.) As anyone less cynical than me would have realized more quickly, it feels good to be surrounded by loved ones, even for a historically traditional celebration which I might have shunned in the past. 

Thanks again to so many people – the Chief, Wonderful Women and Mother of the Bride – for helping with the festivities. We each live in a modern community that we’ve constructed (one that goes beyond family and an office) and I feel so loved in this very generous one.

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Countdown: (21) Bachelorette Party

Today is the bachelorette party. My maid of honor, who I have renamed the “Chief Wonderful Woman,” or “Chief” for short, has planned an amazing day for me at the Brooklyn Botanical Garden and then dinner in New York City.

Instead of traipsing through the gardens in the middle of the most poetic borough (home to the Brooklyn Book Festival), I am lying in my childhood twin bed blogging. I am trying to avoid getting sick. My body feels like a stone; I am exhausted from so many things, as you might be able to guess. 

The Chief, Mother of the Bride and I decided to cut the day short and start with dinner, which sounds great. I feel terribly guilty for not being in tip-top shape, but I’d hate to get anyone sick at the shower tomorrow. How could I let myself get sick and infect my favorite (female) loved ones? 

The Chief worked closely with me to plan the bachelorette festivities, which I really appreciated. I had strict rules about what not to include (strippers, penis straws, etc.) Otherwise, it was mostly up to her. She worked closely with some of the local bridesmaids (who I call the “Wonderful Women”) and it sounds like a beautiful evening! I can’t wait.

For tonight’s festivities, we decided to invite very close female friends who are local to NYC. I think the very hardest part of the wedding planning has been the various invite lists. As a shy one, it is important to me to have small, intimate groups. Even so, I love many people from different parts of my life for different reasons. 

It was hard for me, who is not only shy, but also a feminist, to decide to limit the invite list to only women. I have male friends who I care about and my fiancé had a co-ed bachelor party, which I didn’t mind (especially since it also didn’t include strippers or … I don’t even want to guess that else it could have had…)

Maybe this shy feminist is slightly more traditional than she realized. It sounds special to gather together as women and celebrate this new step in my life. Planning the wedding, almost like studying abroad and encountering a new culture, has helped me to consider parts of myself that I hadn’t necessarily thought carefully about before.

So here I am, waiting in bed until the evening. As the Italians say, I’ll be “brava.”

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Guest Blogging @ Survive Wedding Season

Thanks so much for posting my Expert Survival Tip: Personalized Wedding Poems, Survive Wedding Season!

Readers, I hope you’ll click through their great website. It is a unique online destination specifically designed for wedding guests. They give great advice, from bachelorette parties to gifts. Enjoy!

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