A family friend asked me about the wording on our invitation. We invited guests to our celebrate our “union,” not our “wedding.” Why?
There are two reasons. First, we would want to wait to get married until all couples have the option to get married legally. However, becoming a legal unit is important to us and we’ve found it impossible to wait. By using the word union, as in, a “civil union,” we give a nod towards that fight.
Also, we like the idea of a “union,” over the more traditional “marriage.” The difference does not only contain the legal rights (without religious implications), but also the meaning of the word. A union brings together two entities as equal parts who become one by choice.
As writers, academic and creative, words are important to us. We have chosen them carefully for what they mean to us and others.
There is no denying that a marriage offers us, a heterosexual couple, certain legal rights (hospital visitation, shared health insurance, etc.) How is it possible that marriage, or at the very least the rights inherent in a legal marriage, is not available to all couples in our country?
Do I believe that all couples who have the legal option to get married do so? Of course not. It is a choice.
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when steve and i “married” 2 years ago, we chose not to do legal work, opting for a spiritual, community wedding, as so many of our friends are forced to do. (and trust me, we’re married!) but now steve’s entertaining the thought of an extended gig in thailand. hmmm we thought, we might have to get married legally. you don’t want any questions when you’re messing around with international law!
but one way or the other my dear, have a fabulous, faboulous time and be very happy in your life together!
blessings, peace and love, ann
Thanks for your thoughts and good wishes, Ann! Wow – Thailand! That’s exciting. I look forward to hearing all about it.